Everyday Is Father's Day-Confessions Of A Stay-at-home-Dad!



Posted: Monday, June 11, 2007

by

I have been a stay-at-home-Dad for nearly six years. I get varied responses from people when they find out I'm a "homemaker" and my wife is the "breadwinner." From women I get positive remarks and men look at me like I'm nuts! Sometimes, I have to admit, it is hard for me to be home while my wife works. Alot of times I deal with guilt about not contributing financially to seeing ball games and track meets when my wife misses out due to work. However, she would not be able to do what she does and work the hours she does without me home. It was her idea in the first place.

I worked at an airport FBO where I was a dayshift supervisor until I was fired for trying to start a union. I lost my job on September 7, 2001. I felt I'd get a job in the airline industry fairly easily as I had alot of experience and was good at what I did. However, September 11, 2001 came along and the airline industry went downhill. I couldn't find a job anywhere, in any industry. Most businesses placed a freeze on hiring until they saw how the economy would turn out. We struggled along on one income for a year. Then my wife, who is a Registered Nurse, got the opportunity to be a Director Of Nursing at a long term care facility. It meant a hefty pay raise and a great opportunity, but also she would work alot of hours and the stress level was much higher. So she asked me to quit looking for a job and just stay home and take care of our three children and the household duties so the only thing she had to worry about was her job. With her pay raise she could handle our bills so I relunctantly took my position as "house manager."

I found out it was something I was good at. I do it all; cooking, cleaning, laundry, grocery shopping, taxi service for the kids, managing the bills, etc. On top of all that, during the summer I do the mowing and outside work as well. I approached all my duties like a job. But unlike a job, I'm the boss! Now I'm not sure I could go back to working for someone on a job because I really like being my own boss. I get everything done, but I decide when I do it. I make my own schedule. I can spread everything out over the week, or do alot one day and take the next day off. It is really great.

As Father's Day approaches, I reflect back and realize how truly blessed I am. I have three great kids who don't get in trouble. When my sixteen year old son goes out, we don't have to worry about whether he's doing drugs or drinking alcohol because I've been home and he has to answer to me. He has never had time to get in trouble because I'm there when he gets home from school. My twelve year old son is a 4.0 student because I was there to help him with his homework when he was struggling and teach him how to study. My daughter, who is six, is an exceptional student and a great softball player because I was there to help with homework and had time to play ball with her. Unlike my boys, she never remembers a time when I wasn't home. She doesn't remember baby-sitters. And that is truly great!

I'm also thankful for my wonderful wife who saw something in me that told her I could handle being home with the kids. She has sacraficed something she can never get back, her time! She has missed alot of her children's ball games, track meets and times when they did something great or funny all because she was at work. That is why I do my best to take care of her as well and make her life at home as easy as I can. She is my hero!

So I know I'm the luckiest guy on the face of the earth, not just today, but everyday. They may celebrate Father's Day once a year, but for me everyday is Father's Day!

This is dedicated to my wife, Sonni and our three wonderful children, Jimmy, Ryan and Katie!

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Top-level comments on this article: (3 total)
» left by Ben Jones
 4 years 224 days ago.
71 fans.
James, an enjoyable read and I am very happy to hear it has worked out so well for you and your family. Kudos to you!
» left by 4 years 223 days ago.
Thank you for the comment, Ben! I didn't think at first it would work out as well as it has. It is good to know you can make a difference in your children's lives! James
» left by Lorrie Davids
 4 years 223 days ago.
96 fans.
How wonderful to read about a "hands on" dad in a time when so many dads are too busy chasing the dollar to remember their kids need them. Happy Father's Day!
» left by Judi Lake
 4 years 222 days ago.
99 fans. Follow Judi Lake on twitter!
James, I applaud you tremendously and how lucky you are to be such an important part of your children's lives -- many dad's can't. It's funny, people don't get it; because I've moved my office to my home to be accessible to my daughter and dad, people think I watch TV all day but who cares? you know who you are and what you're doing and why. Thanks for an inspiring article!
» left by 4 years 221 days ago.
Thanks, Judi! I know there are people (mostly men) who think I have it made and sit around all day drinking beer and watching ESPN! I can assure them I probably work harder now than I ever did at a "job!"
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